Wheel of Fortune

I'm not afraid to admit that I watch Wheel of Fortune (it comes on before Jeopardy and at least watching Wheel of Fortune doesn't make me feel nearly as old as I do when I watch the Price Is Right.  Seriously, that show has way too many commercials about catheters and life alert bracelets).  And if I were to ever appear on that show there is something that I really want to do.  And no, it has nothing to "do" with Vanna White (she is about one plastic surgery away from looking alike a scary cat lady).  It has to do with the Bonus Round of the show.  For those of you who don't watch the show, if you have the most money at the end of the game, you move on to the Bonus Round where you solve one more puzzle for a chance at a large amount of money.  However, right before you solve the puzzle Pat Sajak asks you to tell the people at home who in the audience you brought with you and everyone always brings friends and/or family.  What I want to do is hire a couple of "celebrities" (I put that in quotes for a reason) to be my friends and family so that when Pat asks me who I brought with me, this exchange will take place:

Pat - "So, tell us who out in the audience you brought with you today."

Me - "Well, Pat, I brought Mr. T and Screech, oops sorry, I mean Dustin Diamond."

Pat - "Whoa, you're friends with Mr. T and Screech, I mean Dustin Diamond?"

Me - "No I am not, Pat."

Awkward pause.

Pat - "OK, then why are they here?"

Me - "Why not?"

Awkward pause.

Pat - "Hmmmm.  Let's move on."

"I pity the fool who buys unnecessary vowels."