Funniest Nicknames in Sports

Alright, I got to thinking the other day (which is rare) and had a (brainfart) thought.  What happened to all of the awesome nicknames in sports?  We used to have such gems as Clyde 'The Glide' Drexler, Randy 'The Big Unit' Johnson, and William 'The Refrigerator' Perry and that is just a sampling of the the great sports nicknames of yesteryear.  In today's game, everyone has nicknames but they are stupid and generic and usually follow a pattern of using the first letter of someone's name followed by something like 'Smooth' or 'Nuts'.  So, I decided to make a list of the funniest, not best, nicknames of the current players from the big three sports.  And because of the Olympics, we are handing out medals.  Let's do this:

NBA

• Honorable Mention - AK-47 (Andrei Kirilenko, Free Agent), his initials plus his jersey number plus he's Russian makes a great nickname.  (Plus the NBA has a terrible selection of nicknames to choose from.)
• Bronze - The Jambulance (Blake Griffin, LA Clippers), this one actually made me laugh when I saw it.
• Silver - Big Baby (Glen Davis, Orlando), it's funny because he is so large.
• Gold - The Black Mamba (Kobe Bryant, LA Lakers), did you know he gave this nickname to himself?  I find that hilarious.

MLB

• Honorable Mention - Greek God of Walks (Kevin Youkilis, Chicago White Sox) and The Big Donkey (Adam Dunn, Chicago White Sox), they are teammates and both names make me smile.
• Bronze - Fat Elvis (Lance Berkman, St. Louis), come on, that's just funny.
• Silver - Kung Fu Panda (Pablo Sandoval, San Francisco), an original and amusing nickname.
• Gold - El Chupacabra (Yovani Gallardo, Milwaukee), this one isn't funny until you find out what it means in English, it translates to 'The Goatsucker'.  How hilarious is that?

NFL

• Honorable Mention - Pacman (Adam Jones, Cincinnati), another sport with some terrible nicknames, but this one made the cut b/c I didn't like any of the rest.
• Bronze - Purple Jesus (Adrian Peterson, Minnesota), the football gods would approve.
• Silver -  The Law Firm (Benjarvus Green-Ellis, Cincinnati), read that guy's name and don't tell me that it doesn't sound like a law firm, another original and hilarious nickname.
• Gold -  Muscle Hamster (Doug Martin, Tampa Bay), no need to explain, just funny. 

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