Dessert Madness

Society has to stop the boutique dessert places.  They are everywhere.  All I hear about is the new hip pie place or the trendy food truck that serves cupcake balls.  They even opened a popcorn store near me...that is a chain!  Why wouldn't you take the two minutes to pop your plenty good 50 cent popcorn in your own home when you could drive ten minutes to pay five bucks for someone else's popcorn.

Remember when you ordered dessert in a damn restaurant?  Wasn't it nice to order dessert at the same place you ate at - not drive another 20 minutes to get even fatter?  Sure enough, every place I've been to has dessert and it doesn't suck at all.

And why do we need such frilly pastries and evening delights?  Did someone start a club that hates cheesecake and chocolate cake?  Those are delicious, sensible, easy.  If that doesn't suit you then just eat some candy.  When did a good ol' Hershey bar or Skittles take a dive?  Don't hurt our Americana foundation by whoring yourself out to the latest dessert craze, keep it simple stupids!

"This is the only way I will eat fruit for dessert."

***BONUS***

I have my first post for my weekly NFL picks set to debut Saturday but I could not resist to pick the game for the opener on Wednesday.  Enjoy the preview:

Cowboys at Giants -3.5

Wednesday 8:30

-Remember the Super Bowl last year?  Me either!  Turns out the Giants won crowning them best team in the NFL.  They are very good on offense with a solid QB, good RBs, and great WRs, but their strength is their defensive line.  This week some talking heads proclaimed them a Top 10 All-Time D-line.  I don't think I'm prepared to go there but the point is a good one.  Just so happens Dallas' main weakness last year (and especially this preseason) is terrible offensive line play.  The Giant's ends will be closer to Romo than his own running back, DeMarco Murray, and they will be wreaking havoc and causing turnovers.  I don't expect the Giants to crush them but a solid double digit win should be in the cards.