Ranking Batmans

This is probably unnecessary, but we here at Brainfart are going to do it anyways.  Our criteria is solely based on the quality of the respective actors' movie(s) and the believability of that actors' portrayal of being Bruce Wayne/Batman.  Alright, let's rank us some Batmans:

5) George Clooney - this one is easy, he starred in the movie that destroyed the Batman franchise and killed comic book movies until the first X-Men movie came out in 2000 (unless you liked the first Blade, which came out the year after Clooney's piece of shit).  If you actually did like Batman & Robin, then you need to look in a mirror and reassess your life, because that thing was beyond awful and you have a terrible taste in movies.  However, I guess we should thank him for killing the franchise because it did indirectly lead to the creation of Christopher Nolan's awesome Dark Knight trilogy, but still, his movie sucked balls.

4) Val Kilmer - while I don't think Val was anywhere near as bad as Clooney, it's just that the rest of the people on this list were better.  Also, it doesn't help him that Batman Forever was the movie that you could tell was a transition from Tim Burton's good Batman movies to Joel Shumacher's piece of shit Batman movie.  And we can all blame that on Jim Carrey, it seems as if everyone in that movie was trying to be as ridiculous as Jim Carrey's character and it just made that movie stupid.

T-2) Adam West - a tie, you say?  Yes, a tie.  Even though Adam West's portrayal of Batman was silly, he was still good enough at it that he made a movie and starred in 120 episodes of the 70's TV show.  Plus you have to love his character on Family Guy and that bumps him up into a tie with our next Batman.

T-2) Micheal Keaton - when Tim Burton first cast Keaton as Batman, the fans thought he was crazy because Mike (that's what I call him) had done mostly comedies up to that point in his career.  However, Tim Burton didn't care what the fans thought and he was correct with his choice and the fans proved once again that they don't know what they are talking about.  Mike nailed it and is the only actor other than Christian Bale to star in more than one movie as Batman.  Sure, you wouldn't look at Mike and think he would whip your ass in a fight, but he still played a great Bruce Wayne/Batman and surprised a lot of people when the movie came out.

1) Christian Bale - the King of Being Batman, no doubt about it, no argument, can't dispute this choice no matter how good of a case you have for someone else, he was the best and it isn't even close.  His only flaw was the "Batman Voice", but even that was cool.  Also, I read somewhere that he bulked up so much for Batman Begins that Christopher Nolan made him lose weight in order to play the part.  I thought that was pretty hardcore and when a guy is that into a part that he overdid it, you know he was the best.

"Yeah, this guy was a better Batman than Clooney and Kilmer and one of those guys won an Oscar."