Movie Trailer Review - Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

This is not a review of the trailer, but a review of this movie based entirely on this movie's trailer.  I have a special talent of being able to figure out whether a movie will be any good based just on the trailer and I'm finally putting that talent to good use.  Screw you, it's a real talent.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

It can't be good when the only person returning from the first movie is the guy who plays the main ape, Caesar (Andy Serkis who also played Gollum from the Lord of the Rings).  I saw the first movie and considering I can't even remember the name of it should tell you everything you need to know about it.

On to the trailer.  It looks dumb.  That's all.  Don't go see it.  In fact, I still don't see why this even got made.  Does anyone really care how the apes ended up in charge?  On top of that, humans have better weapons and definitely have a better understanding of battle tactics, so I still don't know how we lost.  Oh crap, I just gave you a reason to see this.  Disregard what I just said.

Estimated Opening Weekend Box Office Gross - $40 million

What Kind of Fart This Movie Will Resemble:

The Splatter Fart - Unfortunately the Splatter Fart exists. It is the wettest of all farts. It probably should not be called a fart at all.