Weekly Picks of the Week - Bowl Games Part 2

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

Chick-fil-a Peach Bowl
#9 Mississippi Rebels v. #6 TCU Horned Frogs (-3.5)

Georgia Dome, Atlanta
Wed. Dec. 31, 12:30

ESPN

Fiesta Bowl
#20 Boise State Broncos (+3.5) v. #10 Arizona Wildcats

University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale AZ

Wed. Dec. 31, 4:00

ESPN

Orange Bowl
#7 Mississippi State Bulldogs v. #12 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (+7)

Sun Life Stadium, Miami

Wed. Dec. 31, 8:00

ESPN

Outback Bowl
#19 Auburn Tigers (-6.5) v. #18 Wisconsin Badgers

Raymond James Stadium, Tampa

Thur. Jan. 1, 12:00

ESPN 2

Cotton Bowl
#8 Michigan State Spartans v. #5 Baylor Bears (-3)

AT&T Stadium, Arlington TX

Thur. Jan. 1, 12:30

ESPN

Citrus Bowl
#16 Missouri Tigers (-5.5) v. #25 Minnesota Golden Gophers

Florida Citrus Bowl, Orlando

Thur. Jan. 1, 1:00

ABC

Rose Bowl
#2 Oregon Ducks v. #3 Florida State Seminoles (+9)

Rose Bowl, Pasadena CA

Thur. Jan. 1, 5:00

ESPN

Sugar Bowl
#1 Alabama Crimson Tide v. #4 Ohio State Buckeyes (+9)

Superdome, New Orleans

Thur. Jan. 1, 8:30

ESPN

Alamo Bowl
#11 Kansas State Wildcats v. #14 UCLA Bruins (-1)

Alamodome, San Antonio

Fri. Jan. 2, 6:45

ESPN

-You'll notice that I didn't include sponsors' names with each bowl game except for one.  The Chick-fil-a Peach Bowl.  That's because they keep changing their name and it confuses me.  It started as the Peach Bowl, then went to the Chick-fil-a Peach Bowl, then just the Chick-fil-a Bowl, and now it's back to the Chick-fil-a Peach Bowl.  I guess they had to change it back because it is part of the College Football Playoff rotation alongside the Orange, Sugar, Rose, Fiesta, and Cotton Bowls and being just the Chick-fil-a Bowl would have stood out a little bit in that group.

-Stat of the Week:  Division III team Mount Union has a 129-6 record over their last 135 games.  All six losses are to the same team, Wisconsin-Whitewater.

-The first bowl game between two ranked teams doesn't occur until New Year's Eve.  That's another reason bowl games are pointless.  These (exhibition) games are supposed to be between the best teams in the country and yet more than half of them are between teams that aren't even truly worthy of being there.  They really need to trim down the number of bowl games and spread out the good ones.  Then again, I'll watch a game between two teams whose mascots I couldn't identify if a gun was pointed at my head just because I would rather watch that over basketball any day.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"This might be my new winner for funniest GameDay sign of the year."

-Alright, enjoy the rest of the stupid bowl games.

Bowl Game Results: 0-0
Final Regular Season Results: 40-42

Weekly Picks of the Week - Bowl Games Part 1

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

Sun Bowl
#15 Arizona State Sun Devils v. Duke Blue Devils (+7.5)

Sun Bowl, El Paso TX
Sat. Dec. 27, 2:00
CBS

Independence Bowl
Miami Hurricanes (-3) v. South Carolina Gamecocks

Independence Stadium, Shreveport LA
Sat. Dec. 27, 3:30

ABC

Holiday Bowl
Nebraska Cornhuskers v. #24 USC Trojans (-7)

Qualcomm Stadium, San Diego
Sat. Dec. 27, 8:00

ESPN

Russell Athletic Bowl
Oklahoma Sooners v. #17 Clemson Tigers (+3)

Florida Citrus Bowl, Orlando
Mon. Dec. 29, 5:30

ESPN

Music City Bowl
Notre Dame Fighting Irish v. #23 LSU Tigers (-7.5)

LP Field, Nashville
Tue. Dec. 30, 3:00

ESPN

Belk Bowl
#13 Georgia Bulldogs v. #21 Louisville Cardinals (+7)

Bank of America Stadium, Charlotte
Tue. Dec. 30, 6:30

ESPN

-Here comes my yearly reminder that bowl games are pointless.  Beyond pointless.  At least this year, there will be three games that actually matter instead of just the one, but the rest are a bunch of glorified exhibition games.  Not only are they pointless, the players know they are pointless and generally only one team shows up to play and the other one just shows up to have a good time in a random town.  On top of that, 80 of the 128 FBS teams qualified for a bowl game.  That's 62.5%.  Insanity.  It's like giving out Participation Trophies to little league kids because their parents don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.  Look at it this way, all a team has to do is load up on crappy non-conference teams and then win just two conference games and they can play in a bowl game.  How does that make sense?  Penn State did just that.  All I'm trying to say is that bowl games are pointless and I really can't stand watching two 6-6 teams duke it out in the Crappy.com Craptastic Bowl.

-Why is every bowl game but the Sun Bowl on an ESPN-affiliated network?  In other words, how has ESPN not gotten their greedy palms on that one game yet?

-I finished the season with another winning week.  So, I am on a role.  Too bad that bowl games are impossible to pick but I'm doing it anyways, just for you guys.  You're welcome.  As always, I guarantee a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

-Alright, enjoy the first week of stupid bowl games.

Last Week's Results: 3-2
Season Results: 40-42
Bowl Game Results: 0-0

Weekly Picks of the Week - Championship Week

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

PAC-12 Championship
#7 Arizona Wildcats (+14) v. #2 Oregon Ducks

Levi's Stadium, Santa Clara CA
Friday 9:00
FOX

SEC Championship
#16 Missouri Tigers v. #1 Alabama Crimson Tide (-14.5)

Georgia Dome, Atlanta
4:00
CBS

#9 Kansas State Wildcats (N/A) @ #6 Baylor Bears

7:45
ESPN

ACC Championship
#4 Florida State Seminoles v. #11 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (+4)

Bank of America Stadium, Charlotte
8:00
ABC

Big 10 Championship
#13 Wisconsin Badgers v. #5 Ohio State Buckeyes (+4.5)

Lucas Oil Stadium, Indianapolis
8:15
FOX

-NFL Draft "Expert" Mel Kiper Jr. said this before the 2010 Draft:

“If [Clausen is] not a successful starting quarterback in the NFL, I’m done. That’s it. I’m out.”

After starting 10 games his rookie year, Jimmy Clausen hasn't started a game since.  Clausen sucked so bad his first year in the league (3 TDs, 9 INTs) that the Panthers went out and drafted Cam Newton first overall the following year.  That means he was so bad that they weren't even willing to give him a second year to develop.  On top of the fact that he sucked so bad that his team got the first pick in the draft the next year.  If I'm not mistaken, this means that Mel Kiper Jr. owes us his resignation.

-Stat of the Week:
Years in the SEC:  Missouri - 3, South Carolina - 23
Division Titles:  Missouri - 2, South Carolina - 1

SEC Least Update

-I know I said that I wouldn't make fun of the SEC East again this season, but last weekend made me break that promise.  The almighty SEC went 0-4 against the lowly ACC last weekend, and all four teams that lost were from the SEC East.  I found that too hilarious not to mention.

-Two winning weeks in a row!  I am on a roll.  And I would have gone 4-1 if I didn't chicken out and pick Minnesota like I wanted to but didn't want to be picking so many visiting teams.  Oh well.  You can expect my streak to continue this week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"If you don't get why that's funny, it's either because 1) you don't have Chick-fil-a in your town and didn't know they are closed on Sundays, or 2) you also wait outside Chick-fil-a on Sundays."

-Alright, enjoy championship week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 3-2
Season Results: 37-40

Weekly Pick of the Week - Rivalry Week

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#11 Arizona Wildcats @ #13 Arizona State Sun Devils

The Duel in the Desert
Friday 3:30
FOX

#16 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (+12.5) @ #9 Georgia Bulldogs

Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate
12:00
SEC Network

#4 Mississippi State Bulldogs (-3) @ #19 Mississippi Rebels

The Egg Bowl
3:30
CBS

#18 Minnesota Golden Gophers @ #14 Wisconsin Badgers (-14)

The Battle for Paul Bunyan's Axe
3:30
Big 10 Network

#15 Auburn Tigers @ #1 Alabama Crimson Tide (-9.5)

The Iron Bowl
7:45
ESPN

-Yup, I'm only picking 5 games during rivalry week.  I was shocked at how few of the traditional rivalries seem to heavily favor one team right now and aren't worth picking, like Ohio State v. Michigan, Florida v. Florida State, and Oregon v. Oregon State.  Or both teams of a traditional rivalry suck too much to be worth picking, like Notre Dame v. USC and South Carolina v. Clemson (it truly pains me to write that, but to be fair, that game is impossible to pick without knowing who Clemson's starting QB will be).

-Which scenario leads to playoff expansion faster?  1) Three SEC teams make the 4-team playoff?  Or, 2) No SEC teams make the 4-team playoff?  Oddly enough, I think it might be number 2 considering that conference believes they are the gods of college football and they would make a much bigger stink if left out of the playoff.  Personally, I would love to see that happen only because I can't stand those uppity jerks (other than Auburn, they have the most non-SEC SEC fans you will ever meet).

-Week 4.  That was the last time I had a winning week.  Yeah, it's sad, but I finally came through and went 4-2 last week.  Oddly enough, I am still only 4 games under .500 on the year.  But now that I am back to my winning ways, I guarantee another winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"There was another sign that said "Lou Holtz Does Butt Stuff" that was really funny, but I thought this one was more fitting for Harvard."

-Alright, enjoy the fourteenth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 4-2
Season Results: 34-38

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 13

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#12 Kansas State Wildcats @ West Virginia Mountaineers (-2)

Thursday 7:00
Fox Sports 1

#24 Louisville Cardinals (+3.5) @ Notre Dame Fighting Irish

3:30
NBC

#25 Minnesota Golden Gophers (+10.5) @ #23 Nebraska Cornhuskers

12:00
ESPN

#15 Arizona Wildcats (+4) @ #17 Utah Utes

3:30
ESPN

#20 Missouri Tigers @ Tennessee Volunteers (-3.5)

7:30
ESPN

#19 USC Trojan @ #9 UCLA Bruins (-3.5)

8:00
ABC

-Hope sucks.  Especially as a college football fan.  I had hope this past weekend when Clemson's star QB was finally set to play after sitting out a few games with a broken finger.  That hope was looking good when he marched down field in his 2nd and 3rd drives of the game.  But then my hope was shattered when he tore his ACL after rushing for a first down inside Georgia Tech's 15 yard line.  What little hope I had left was then destroyed when the backup QB immediately threw a pick-six three plays later, followed by another pick-six later in the game, and another interception that set up an easy 5-yard TD.  Like I said, hope sucks.

-Holy crap, there are a lot of crappy games this week.  And naturally, it's all the SEC's fault!  A few years ago, SEC teams started scheduling a cupcake game before playing their end-of-the-year rival, and that trend caught like wildfire, so now everyone is doing it.  So, you can thank the SEC for making this weekend's college football matchups so boring.

-Did you know that reggae legend Bob Marley had a son that played LB at Miami?  And that his grandson currently plays at Tulane?  Crazy, right?

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

It's official, the SEC East went 2-0 against the SEC West this week and I guess that means I can no longer make fun of that division on a weekly basis.  It was fun while it lasted.

-Well, another losing week for me.  At this point, I feel like teams are reading this post and using it as fodder to get themselves pumped up.  Seriously, why else would I be losing so much?  Oh yeah, it just might, possibly, somewhat, kind of be because I suck at this, but that doesn't seem correct, so I'm going with that first explanation.  Anyways, I guarantee a winning week or you can call your bookie and have him give you your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"There was another one that said 'Jamies Winston's Lawyer for Heisman' that I thought was funny, but this one is just classic."

-Alright, enjoy the thirteenth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 2-4
Season Results: 30-36

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 12

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#19 Clemson Tigers @ #22 Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (+3)

12:00
ESPN

#8 Ohio State Buckeyes (-13) @ #25 Minnesota Golden Gophers

12:00
ABC

#1 Mississippi State Bulldogs (+8.5) @ #5 Alabama Crimson Tide

3:30
CBS

#16 Nebraska Cornhuskers (+6) @ #20 Wisconsin Badgers

3:30
ABC

#9 Auburn Tigers (+2.5) @ #15 Georgia Bulldogs

7:15
ESPN

#3 Florida State Seminoles @ Miami Hurricanes (+3)

8:00
ABC

-Why do poll voters feel like they should drop a team in the polls just because that team lost?  What if that loss was a close game against the best team in the nation on the road?  Should you drop them just because they lost?  No, but they always do.  And what about when the teams behind the team that just lost have the same record but you couldn't say those teams are better than said team, should you drop them in the polls?  Nope, but they still do.  This has never made sense to me.

-Do you think refs get pissed when a call is overturned by replay?  Or do you think they would rather have the play called correctly so that they don't get beat up in the parking lot?

-I have always wondered why they calculate field goal yardage the way they do.  If you don't know for some reason, they take the yardage left to the goal line then tack on 17 more yards (10 for the length of the end zone and 7 for the length from the center to where the ball is set).  But why?  Wouldn't it be easier if a ball is on the 25 yard line when hiked, it is considered a 25 yard field goal?  Why bother with all that extra math?  It makes no sense, unless of course it is a way to make kickers fell better about themselves by adding that extra yardage.

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

No teams from the West played the East this week, but I did stumble upon this sign from College GameDay that I think sums up the SEC East in one nice picture:

"In case you don't know why this is funny, it's b/c Indiana (a really bad team that is winless in Big 10 play) beat Missouri earlier this season."

-Remember when I said I was going to make my picks last week and then switch them?  Well, it didn't matter because I finished 3-3.  Sadly, I'm happy with that outcome only because that is technically not a losing week and I really needed that right now.  But now that I'm off the losing train, I guarantee a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"This is the funniest sign I have seen all year and it's not even close."

-Alright, enjoy the twelfth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 3-3
Season Results: 28-32

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 11

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#12 Baylor Bears (+5) @ #15 Oklahoma Sooners

12:00
Fox Sports 1

#10 Notre Dame Fighting Irish @ #9 Arizona State Sun Devils (-2.5)

3:30
ABC

#7 Kansas State Wildcats (+6) @ #6 TCU Horned Frogs

3:30
FOX

#5 Alabama Crimson Tide @ #16 LSU Tigers (+6.5)

8:00
CBS

#14 Ohio State Buckeyes @ #8 Michigan State Spartans (-3.5)

8:00
ABC

#4 Oregon Ducks (-8.5) @ #17 Utah Utes

10:00
ESPN

-Why do TV execs allot only three hours for college football games on ESPN and other channels when it seems like every game is at least three and a half hours long these days?

-Fun Stat of the Week:  Clemson's opponents' first drive yardage:

-4, -16, -4, -4, 0, 2, -9, 0

Yup, only one team has managed to have positive yardage on their first drive against Clemson this season.  I know that's a worthless stat, but pretty impressive nonetheless.

-Former FSU and current Vikings backup QB Christian Ponder and his wife, ESPN reporter Sam Ponder, named their daughter Bowden.  As in Bobby Bowden, Christian's college coach.  Somehow I feel like that's a weird name to give your daughter.  A son?  Sure, but not your little girl.

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

No teams from the West played the East this week, but that doesn't mean something funny didn't happen.  The only ranked East team (Georgia) got whipped pretty good by a Florida team that got beat 42-13 in their most recent game.  On top of that, South Carolina (the preseason favorite to win the division) blew their third 14-point 4th quarter lead of the season to Tennessee.  Can the East get worse?  Stay tuned!

-Well, I only got one pick correct last week.  One.  And I had to have a miracle fumble at the end of the game just to get that one.  This funk is really starting to get on my nerves.  I honestly don't know how to fix other than to make my picks and then do the complete opposite.  So that's exactly what I did this week and we will see what happens (okay, I tried to do that and found myself picking against myself just so I could do the opposite, so I abandoned that idea and will not just pick normally even if that fails).  I guarantee a winning week or your money back for real this time.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"In case you don't get it, it's funny b/c West Virginia fans burn couches after big wins.  Why?  I'm guessing moonshine and incest make you do stupid things like burning couches."

-Alright, enjoy the eleventh week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 1-4
Season Results: 25-29

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 10

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on CFP Selection Committee Rankings
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#2 Florida State Seminoles @ #25 Louisville Cardinals (+5)

Thursday 7:15
ESPN

#7 TCU Horned Frogs (-6) @ #20 West Virginia Mountaineers

3:30
ABC/ESPN 2

#3 Auburn Tigers (+1.5) @ #1 Mississippi Rebels

7:00
ESPN

#12 Arizona Wildcats (+7) @ #22 UCLA Bruins

10:30
ESPN

#17 Utah Utes @ #14 Arizona State Sun Devils (-5.5)

11:00
Fox Sports 1

-Why do people make a big deal out of someone being the second person to hit a big milestone?  For example, Peyton Manning threw his 500th TD pass recently and the media made a huge deal about it.  But he was also the second person to ever throw 421 through 499, too.  And yet, not a person cared about those TDs, only his 500th.

-Funniest Football Tidbit of the Week - TCU has scored so many points this season that they have run out of fireworks to shoot off after scoring during home games.

-Why is it a penalty if a player celebrates after a TD, but it seems perfectly okay if a defensive player celebrates after a sack?

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

I honestly thought the SEC West could have gone undefeated against the SEC East this season.  But the East's best team (Georgia) beat the West's worst team (Arkansas) a couple of weeks ago to spoil that.  But the West is still dominating, and as of right now, the SEC West is 9-1 against the SEC East after going 3-0 last week.  Unfortunately, there are no East v. West games this week, but stay tuned anyways for more updates.

-Ugh, I've gone 2-4, 2-4, 2-3, and 2-3 the last four weeks.  This is getting annoying.  And I would have had a winning week last week if I didn't have such a longstanding bias against South Carolina and picked them against Auburn like I should have.  Oh well, I guarantee a blah blah blah.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"There were a lot of signs about Katy Perry, but this was my favorite one."

-Alright, enjoy the tenth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 2-3
Season Results: 24-25

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 9

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

Michigan Wolverines @ #5 Michigan State Spartans (-17.5)

3:30
ABC

#3 Mississippi Rebels @ #23 LSU Tigers (+4)

7:15
ESPN

South Carolina GameCOCKS @ #6 Auburn Tigers (-18.5)

7:30
SEC Network

#12 Ohio State Buckeyes (-14) @ Penn State Nittany Lions

8:00
ABC

#21 (the real) USC Trojans (-1) @ #19 Utah Utes

10:00
Fox Sports 1

-Why did Brent Musburger agree to a contract with the SEC Network?  Sure, you could say money, but he went from calling the best games of the week with Kirk Herbstreit to calling the 5th or 6th best SEC game with Jesse Palmer.  Was the money that good?

-Does someone make an edited version of each game that only shows the actual action of each game?  I really want to know because these versions of the game would probably only be 20 minutes long and I wouldn't have to watch all the boring parts of football, especially official reviews.

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

I honestly thought the SEC West would go undefeated against the SEC East this season.  But Georgia went and ruined that this past weekend by beating Arkansas.  In any case, that might be the East's only win against the West.  As of right now, the SEC West is 6-1 against the SEC East after the West went 2-1 this weekend against the East.  Stay tuned for more updates!

-Well, I had another losing week last week with a 2-3 record.  I honestly don't know why I'm in a funk.  It's probably because I'm guessing just like everybody else.  But I promise a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Signs:

"This was the best picture I could find of this sign, but it cracked me up b/c I've been saying all along about how far ESPN is stuck up the SEC's butt."

"Loved this one more though."

-Alright, enjoy the ninth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 2-3
Season Results: 22-22

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 8

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#14 Kansas State Wildcats @ #11 Oklahoma Sooners (-7.5)

12:00
ESPN

#21 Texas A&M Aggies @ #7 Alabama Crimson Tide (-11.5)

3:30
CBS

#15 Oklahoma State Cowboys (+9) @ #12 TCU Horned Frogs

4:00
Fox Sports 1

#5 Notre Dame Fighting Irish (+12) @ #2 Florida State Seminoles

8:00
ABC

#20 Stanford Cardinal (-3) @ #18 Arizona State Sun Devils

10:30
ESPN

-In the past NFL Draft, Texas didn't have a single player drafted.  Why is this worth noting?  Because if you look back at the Longhorns' three recruiting classes that would have been eligible for that draft, you would shocked.  According to Rivals.com's recruiting rankings, Texas's recruiting classes from 2009 to 2011 were ranked 5th, 3rd, and 3rd, and yet somehow none of those players were taken by an NFL team.  How is that possible?  Sure, you might whiff on a couple guys, but that many?  Truly amazing.

-Craziest Stat of the Week - Michigan played its third ever night game at home.

-Fun Fact - Dolph Lundgren, aka Ivan Drago, briefly went to Clemson.

SEC West v. SEC Least Update!!!

I honestly think the SEC West could go undefeated against the SEC East this season.  As of right now, the SEC West is 4-0 against the SEC East and if the East is going to get a win against the West, it might have to be this weekend when Georgia travels to Arkansas.  If they don't pull it off, I don't know who will and my prediction will come to fruition.  Stay tuned for more updates.

-Well, another 2-4 week last week, but I'm totally cool with that because of Clemson's way-too-close win against Louisville.  I probably would have done better if I hadn't of doubted both of the Mississippi schools like I did.  Let's hope I learned my lesson.  Probably not.  I guarantee a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"The first one was funny, but the second one is hilarious for all the wrong reasons, and that's why I picked it, too."

-Alright, enjoy the eighth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 2-4
Season Results: 20-19

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 7

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#10 Georgia Bulldogs @ #24 Missouri Tigers (+3)

12:00
CBS

#2 Auburn Tigers (-3) @ #6 Mississippi State Bulldogs

3:30
CBS

#12 TCU Horned Frogs @ #3 Baylor Bears (-8.5)

3:30
ABC/ESPN2

#11 Oregon Ducks (-3) @ #17 UCLA Bruins

3:30
FOX

#4 Mississippi Rebels @ #14 Texas A&M Aggies (-2)

9:00
ESPN

USC Trojans @ #13 Arizona State Sun Devils (+2.5)

10:30
ESPN2

-I've always wondered how often the ball changes possession at the bottom of a fumble pile.

-I have a weird Fantasy Football Theory and it goes like this: whichever team has the most players playing after the 1:00 games is generally the winner of that weekly match-up.  Basically, the more players a team has playing in the 4:00 Sunday afternoon games, Sunday night game, and Monday night game has a better chance of winning.  This season, I am 2-0 when I have the most players playing in the later games and 1-2 when my opponent has the most.  I don't know why this is, but it seems to work out more often than not.

-Funniest thing I heard Recently - 19 freshmen named Peyton enrolled at the University of Tennessee this year.  Peyton first started as QB at Tennessee roughly 19 years ago.  You do the math.

-I should have finished 3-3 last week but got hosed on a late missed FG that hit the post and the cross-bar in the Nebraska v. Michigan State game.  Plus, I decided to go with Mississippi State at the last second but forgot to change it on last week's post and wouldn't have felt honest if I just did it anyways after posting it.  Oh well, that's life.  In any case, I guarantee a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"I couldn't decide between these two, so they both win."

-Alright, enjoy the seventh week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 2-4
Season Results: 18-15

"There were two reasons to look forward to Katy Perry being on College Gameday, but then she wore that sweater and we never got to see her two reasons.  What a shame."

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 6

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#7 Texas A&M Aggies (+2.5) @ #14 Mississippi State Bulldogs

12:00
ESPN

#1 Alabama Crimson Tide (-7) @ #11 Mississippi Rebels

3:30
CBS

#3 Oklahoma Sooners (-5.5) @ #25 TCU Horned Frogs

3:30
FOX

#13 Stanford Cardinal @ #8 Notre Dame Fighting Irish (+1.5)

3:30
NBC

#15 LSU Tigers @ #5 Auburn Tigers (-7.5)

7:00
ESPN

#17 Nebraska Cornhuskers @ #10 Michigan State Spartans (-7.5)

8:00
ABC

-Why is a Delay of Game penalty always credited to the quarterback when it's the center who didn't hike the ball before the play clock expired?

-There are three games between Top 25 teams at 3:30 on Saturday.  Clemson plays at 3:30 as well.  I wonder how many people will casually tune into the Clemson game.

-Why do only defenses get "gassed"?  Offenses run around just as much as the defense.

-The College Football Playoff will expand sooner rather than later for two reasons.  1) Money!  2) Because of the exclusion of a Power 5 conference champion or an 11-1 Notre Dame.  And that will happen this season and the left out team will go nuts about it.  I would not be surprised if the playoff expands next season especially when those money-grubbing whores see how much cash this thing will bring in.  On top of an 12-1 Ohio State being left out of the playoff when an 11-2 SEC team gets in.  Mark my words.

-Considering I started 0-3 last week, I'm pretty happy I broke even, mostly thanks to South Carolina's 4th quarter collapse.  Well, I guarantee a winning week or your money back!

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

"GameDay was in Columbia, SC this past weekend, so their signs were all dumb.  Instead, here is a picture of one of their classy fans."

-Alright, enjoy the sixth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 3-3
Season Results: 16-11

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 5

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#10 UCLA Bruins @ #12 Arizona State Sun Devils (+4.5)

Thursday 10:00
Fox Sports 1

Tennessee Volunteers @ #13 Georgia Bulldogs (-16.5)

12:00
ESPN

Arkansas Razorbacks @ #7 Texas A&M Aggies (-9)

3:30
CBS

#14 Stanford Cardinal @ Washington Huskies (+8)

4:15
???

Missouri Tigers (+5.5) @ #15 South Carolina Jerkwads

7:00
ESPN

North Carolina Tarheels @ Clemson Tigers (-14)

7:00
ESPNU

-I honestly don't know why football is so popular.  It's not exactly a game you can just pick up play with a couple of buddies unless you just pass the ball around.  Is it the violence?  That's the only answer I can come up with, and if that's the case, something is really wrong with us.  We should look into that.

-Now, I know from time to time my dear readers will go to other websites.  I'm totally cool with that.
Maybe one of those site is even Fox Sports.  And maybe one the articles you like to read is Stewart Mandel's College Football Mailbag.  If you happened to read said article this week, then you might have noticed that I got a mailbag question answered.  I'm pretty stoked about it, check it out:

Stewart, Can you please set America straight on the definition of "Clemsoning" and how Clemson's extremely painful loss to Florida State didn't actually fit into that definition?

-- Sam from Greenville, S.C.

I’m not one of the people most qualified to answer that, so I called on Dan Rubenstein, co-host of the tremendous Solid Verbal podcast, which literally wrote the dictionary definition of “Clemsoning.” He said:

“As it related to losing at No. 1 Florida State when big Clemson expectations were already tempered after the second half of the Georgia game, the Tigers very clearly weren’t involved in a traditional Clemsoning. BUT, if we’re to believe that Clemsoning is a real, higher-college-football-forces-at-work phenomenon (which, obviously it is), Clemson’s late stumble did kind of feel like some sort of weird correction of the college football universe, which I called a ‘Clemsoning Express.’

"Ruling: Not a Clemsoning, but much in the way post-halftime fireworks smoke always seems to hang over the Holiday Bowl field, a Clemsoning haze was present for the late minutes of Saturday night’s game.”

In case you are wondering, my definition of "Clemsoning" is "anytime a team with high expectations inexplicably loses to a team that they never should lose to, usually in an embarrassing fashion".  In Clemson's case this past weekend, they were nearly two touchdown underdogs on the road against the #1 team in college football, and while they lost in an embarrassing fashion, they weren't supposed to win, so their loss shouldn't count as "Clemsoning" and Stewart's answer confirms that.  Meeting adjourned.

-A solid 5-1 week last week.....and yet I would trade all of those correct picks in for Clemson's kicker to have made more than 1 of his 3 field goal attempts.  So painful to have a crappy kicker.  Oh well, I guarantee a winning week or your money back!

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

(this is why Jameis Winston was suspended last weekend, except he said "her" instead of "Clemson")

-Alright, enjoy the fifth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 5-1
Season Results: 13-8

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 4

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#5 Auburn Tigers @ #20 Kansas State Wildcats (+9.5)

Thursday 7:30
ESPN

Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (+8) @ Virginia Tech Hokies

12:00
ESPN

Florida Gators @ #2 Alabama Crimson Tide (-15.5)

3:30
CBS

#25 North Carolina Tarheels @ East Carolina Pirates (-2.5)

3:30
ESPNU

Mississippi State Bulldogs @ #8 LSU Tigers (-10)

7:00
ESPN

Miami Hurricanes @ #22 Nebraska Cornhuskers (-7)

8:00
ESPN2

#24 Clemson Tigers (+19.5) @ #1 Florida State Seminoles

8:00
ABC

-I should point out that I picked Clemson with that line before Jamies Winston was suspended for the 1st half of the game.  Can I prove this?  Sure, I'm a Clemson fan, of course I picked them to cover as soon as I saw the initial line.

-Why don't they have a stat for passing yards at the catch?  What I mean is, they should have a stat that shows how many yards a QB threw for at the point at which the WR caught the ball.  This would give us a better idea of whether the QB is any good or if his WRs are the ones making him look good.  Too many times do I see a QB who has huge yardage, but all of that yardage is on a screen pass that the WR took for big yardage.  For example, during this past week's Monday Night Football, the Eagle's Darren Sproles had 152 receiving yards, 148 of which were after the catch.  So, that means that Eagles' QB Nick Foles was only responsible for 4 of those yards, but gets credit for all 152 yards.  And that is why we need a stat for something like this.  I should point out that Foles is my fantasy football QB and loved every yard, but I still feel like they should have some sort of stat that accounts for the talent of said QB's wide receivers.

-If you gave every coach the exact same players, who would win the most games?  I honestly want to know.

-I heard an interview with Seattle Seahawks' cornerback Richard Sherman the other day that made me stop and think about something he said.  Basically, he said that the NFL keeps making more and more rules that favor the offense because it allows for more points which makes fantasy football more appealing.  And because fantasy football makes the NFL tons of money, they are making the game more fun for fantasy players.  Oddly enough, that makes a ton of sense.  Why else would they keep screwing over defenses?  Safety?  Ha!

-Well, that's what I get for picking all road teams, a 1-4 week.  I've learned my lesson.  Or I at least probably should have learned a lesson here, but that could all change a week from now.  Okay, I didn't actually learn any lessons and have no intentions of doing so anytime soon.  In any case, I guarantee a winning week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

(Two reasons I liked this one the best, 1) So true, and 2) Carlton.)

-Alright, enjoy the fourth week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 1-4
Season Results: 8-7

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 3

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

Central Florida Knights (+10) @ #22 Missouri Tigers

12:00
SEC Network

West Virginia Mountaineers (+3.5) @ Maryland Terrapins

12:00
Big 10 Network

#6 Georgia Bulldogs (-6) @ #23 South Carolina Jerkwads

3:30
CBS

Tennessee Volunteers (+20.5) @ #3 Oklahoma Sooners

8:00
ABC

#12 UCLA Bruins (-8) @ Texas Longhorns

8:00
FOX

-Yup, all road teams.

-If ESPN didn't own the rights to the SEC, would Johnny Manziel be as popular as he is?  Would he have been drafted in 1st round?  What I mean is, ESPN seems to love to shove this guy down our throats at every chance they can and if they weren't such a big influence in the world of sports, would he be as big a deal as he is?  Look at it this way, who was the last SEC player that they reported everything about, from his practice reports to if he sneezed in the locker room?  One word - Tebow.  And what happened to him?  ESPN created such a media frenzy around him that he can't even get a third-string QB job in the league because no team wants to deal with the unnecessary nonsense that follows him around.  All I'm saying is, once the overrated Manziel eventually flames out in Cleveland (and it will happen), will he have the same fate as Tebow?  Actually, I would say no, but that's because Manziel is an ugly little guy who wouldn't make a good transition to TV analyst.

-And here is another reason to hate the deal ESPN made with the SEC.

• Sam Houston State v. LSU 7:30 SEC Network
• San Jose State v. Auburn 7:00 ESPN2
• East Carolina v. South Carolina 7:00 ESPNU

That was ESPN's primetime lineup on Saturday night.  Of those three games, only one was mildly entertaining and that was because the Gamecocks are still wildly overrated.  I probably should have picked that game instead of the BYU v. Texas game last week.

-And speaking of the deal between ESPN and the SEC, I'm sort of shocked that GameDay is going to Fargo for the North Dakota State game instead of Columbia, SC for a Top 25 match-up (the only one of the weekend) between two SEC teams.  Then again, South Carolina kind of sucks.  BURN!!!

-As for my picks last week, I went 4-1 and that one loss was on a game I picked only because I needed to choose five games.  Stupid Texas.  And yet, I'm picking their game again this week, what is wrong with me?  It doesn't really matter because I still did awesome and will do so again this week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

(I didn't actually see GameDay last week because I was went to the Clemson game, so this was the best I could find after scrounging the internet.)

-Alright, enjoy the third week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 4-1
Season Results: 7-3

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 2

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#14 USC Trojans (+3) @ #10 Stanford Cardinal

3:30
ABC

#6 Michigan State Spartans @ #4 Oregon Ducks (-12)

6:30
FOX

Michigan Wolverines @ #15 Notre Dame Fighting Irish (-3.5)

7:30
NBC

BYU Cougars @ #25 Texas Longhorns (-1.5)

7:30
Fox Sports 1

Virginia Tech Hokies (+11) @ #7 Ohio State Buckeyes

8:00
ESPN

-A buddy of mine asked me this summer what record Clemson could finish with and I would be happy.  My response was 1-11, as long as that one win was against those dirty South Carolina Gamecocks.  Then I got to thinking about it and realized that that response was not only the funny answer but also true.  Just imagine if your favorite team was winless going into the last game against your arch-rival and your team won.  You could hold that win over their heads for years.  They would say "Your team sucks, they only won one game" and you can always respond with "Yeah, but who did they beat, sucka!".  Sure, it would suck to have such a shitty record, but hilarious that you won the one game that truly matters.

-How many bandwagon SEC fans do you think know what SEC stands for?

-When I heard that Brent Musburger was going to announce games for the SEC Network, I was fairly curious to see who they would pick to be his color analyst.  So, I tuned into the Texas A&M v. South Carolina game to find out and then heard the worst choice possible.  Jesse Palmer.  I can't stand that guy.  I know I've expressed my dislike for him on multiple occasions in last year's WPOTW, but seriously, this is an insult to college football.  That guy is a blowhard and seems to speak just to hear the sound of his own voice.  He adds nothing to the game but false or blatantly obvious statements.  As fellow Brainfart contributor Alex, a Georgia Tech grad but childhood South Carolina fan, texted me during the game "There's nothing worse than losing and having to listen to Jesse Palmer".  And to top it off, he has grown the douchiest beard possible.  Epic fail, SEC Network.

-As for my picks last week, I finished above .500 and would have done better had I not switched the FSU pick at the last second.  Oh well.  In any case, I guarantee a winning week this week or your money back.

-Last Week's Funniest College GameDay Sign:

(If you don't get this, Google "Jameis Winston Crab Legs" and then you will laugh, too.)

-Alright, enjoy the second week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 3-2
Season Results: 3-2

Weekly Picks of the Week - Week 1

Picks in Bold

Rankings based on Coaches Poll
All lines provided by Sportsbook.ag

#20 Texas A&M Aggies (+10.5) @ #9 South Carolina Gamecocks

Thurs 6:00
SEC Network

Boise State Broncos v. #19 Mississippi Rebels (-10)

Georgia Dome, Atlanta
Thurs 8:00
ESPN

#16 Clemson Tigers (+7.5) @ #12 Georgia Bulldogs

5:30
ESPN

#1 Florida State Seminoles (-18) v. Oklahoma State Cowboys

AT&T Stadium, Irving TX
8:00
ABC

#14 Wisconsin Badgers (+5) v. #13 LSU Tigers

NRG Stadium, Houston
9:00
ESPN

-Welcome back to another season of me blindly picking college football games against the spread.  Last season, I had a losing record, which is the first time that has happened to me since I started doing this 5 years ago.  Was it a fluke or did my luck finally run out?  I'm hoping it was a fluke.  Having said that, I will warn you that the hardest week to pick games (other than picking bowl games) is Week 1 because no one really knows how good a team is and picking these games truly is blind luck.  However, I will do the best I can or your money back.

-So, I was researching for my fantasy league and a (brainfart) thought came to me - do football recruits look at a program's former players' NFL success when making their decision for which school they are going to attend?  The reason I bring this up is because the best WR in the NFL is without a doubt Calvin Johnson, who went to Georgia Tech.  Arguably, the second best WR is the NFL is Demaryius Thomas who also went to Georgia Tech.  And yet, Georgia Tech can't recruit a stud WR to save their lives.  Sure, that may have more to do with the fact that they run an offense that runs the ball, but they should still be able to sell the fact that they can produce All-Pro WR's.  Or look at Alabama, they have had the top rated recruiting class each of the past five years, but can you name one former player that has had huge success in the NFL recently?  Julio Jones maybe, but he's been hurt more often than healthy.  Eddie Lacy had one good year.  Otherwise, I can't even name another former Bama player that has been killing it in the pros and yet they keep bringing in every blue chip recruit they want.  So, either Georgia Tech is doing a poor job of selling their former players' NFL success or they are and nobody cares.

-Alright, enjoy the first week of college football.

Last Week's Results: 0-0
Season Results: 0-0