Stupid State Laws - Georgia 13

Here comes another post about a state law that still exists on the books and why it is ridiculous (to see them all, click here):

Georgia

"On Mondays, it is illegal for one to whistle very loud after 11:00 PM."

Loud whistling is annoying any time someone does it, but the specifics of this law are, as the great Chaz Michael Michaels one said, mind-bottling.  Why only Mondays?  And why only after 11:00 PM?  What is so special about Mondays that they had to make such a stupid law to put a stop to loud whistling?  I can only assume it has something to do with Monday Night Football because that would answer both the Monday part of this law and the after 11:00 PM part as well (that's about the time the game would be over).  But MNF is only on 17 weeks a year, so that can't be it.  Georgia, I'm so confused.  Thanks a lot, dick.

"Arrest that man, rookie."
"But Sarge, it's Tuesday, he's not breaking any laws."
"Not because of that, idiot.  Arrest him because he's black, duh."

Saturday's Video of Saturday

Here is our weekly funny video post.  Let's see what we got for you guys:

Set up:  On Thursday on Stephen Colbert's show, Stephen interviewed Smaug from The Hobbit movies and it was awesome:

Summary:  I don't know what was better, the part where they argue over the pronunciation of Smaug's name or the part where Smaug calls Benedict Cumberbatch a "hack" (if you didn't know, Cumberbatch does the voice of Smaug).  I'm going with the part where they make fun of his name only because my brother and I do the same thing all the time.

Movie Trailer Review - Exodus

This is not a review of the trailer, but a review of this movie based entirely on this movie's trailer.  I have a special talent of being able to figure out whether a movie will be any good based just on the trailer and I'm finally putting that talent to good use.  Screw you, it's a real talent.

Exodus: Gods and Kings

I'm not even going to preface this one.  This movie looks like a total piece of shit.  And that's coming from a guy who loves him some Christian Bale.  But come on, you expect me to believe that Batman looks in any way like a guy from the Middle East?  Not a chance.  Sure, this, uhhh, "true" story makes for a good movie material with its locusts, frogs, plagues, and Red Sea parting, but I just don't buy it.  Don't go see this unless you are really into this sort of thing.

Estimated Opening Weekend Box Office Gross - $30 million

What Kind of Fart This Movie Will Resemble:

The Burning Brakes Fart - A silent fart identified by odor alone. Usually and adult fart, occurring while the adult is driving a car or has a front seat passenger who farts. The Burning Brakes Fart actually does smell a little like burning brakes, and seems to hang around longer than most farts Which gives whoever farted a chance to make a big show of checking to see if the emergency brake has been left on. When he finds it hasn't you know who farted. A common automobile fart.

The Logistics of Grocery Stores

Where in the hell does all that food come from in our grocery stores?  Or to be more specific, how does every grocery store have so many perishable items?  Think about it, if you go in your local grocery store, there are at least a hundred jugs of milk and even more cuts of meat, each of which only last a week or two at most.  Not only does every grocery store have all of these perishable items, but there is no way that all of them are sold.  That's a lot of wasted food/milk.

Now think about how many grocery stores are in your town.  Within 10 miles of my house, I can think of a dozen or so grocery stores, all of which have thousands of perishable items for sale.  And that doesn't even include all of the gas stations that sell perishable stuff.  So, if you include those, those number jumps up even more.

So, where does it all come from?  The milk I can understand a lot more than the meat.  It's not like you can raise a cow to maturity in a week, it takes at least a year, and yet I still find hundreds of cuts of meat in my local grocery store every time I walk in.

I guess my real problem with this question is that I live in a city and there isn't a farm within an hour drive.  If I lived in the middle of the country, I can only assume that there are just miles and miles of farms in every direction.  But from where I live, I honestly don't understand where it all comes from.

"This really seems like the only way to drink all of the milk available in your local grocery store.  However, I know from personally experience, chugging a gallon of milk will only come right back up."

Who Is This? Part 30

Okay, this one is kind of tough, so I will give you a legitimate hint right off the bat.  He created one of the first internet memes.  See, I told you I would give you a good hint.  What?  You're not a huge nerd and don't even know what a "meme" is?  Geez, you need to stop playing outside and start playing more video games, you jock.  Here is a better hint then.  He is known for his martial arts skills, for roundhouse kicking people, and for his awesome goatee.  Yup, that's Chuck Norris as a kid teaching that pony who is boss.  Oh, and apparently Vin Diesel was the first first guy to get all of those "Cool Facts" memes and Chuck Norris kind of copied him.  How?  I have no idea, I just work here.

So, what is he up to now?  Considering he is 74 years old, I assume not much other than not trying to die.  In fact, he has only done one movie in the past decade and that was the crappy Expendables 2.

Where Are They Now?

Basically, this will be a new post where I take a popular TV show that is no longer on the air and see how said show's cast is doing these days.  Enjoy:

The Cast of Lost

• Matthew Fox (Jack) - You would have thought this guy would have done something else by now, but other than playing the villain in a non-Tyler Perry, Tyler Perry movie, I can't recall seeing him once since Lost ended.  Weird.
• Evangeline Lilly (Kate) - Of any of the former cast, I would say Evangeline is the only one with a promising career.  She's currently playing a kick-ass elf in the Hobbit franchise and she also snagged a part in the upcoming Ant-Man movie.
• Josh Holloway (Sawyer) - I liked this guy immediately on Lost and to honest, I'm somewhat shocked he hasn't gotten any work outside of a cameo in the 4th Mission: Impossible movie and a short lived CBS show.  And it doesn't get any better because he has nothing in the works.  Also, how did Channing Tatum beat Sawyer out for the role of Gambit in the next X-Men movie?  He is literally the perfect guy to play that part.
• Jorge Garcia (Hugo) - Judging by his IMDB page, Hugo is having the most successful post-Lost career of anyone in the cast.  Just click on his name, he is killing it.
• Terry O'Quinn (Locke) - Locke is having no problems finding work right now.  He's currently doing some show called Gang Related which is his second show since Lost ended.  But let's not forget that before Lost, he played Luke Wilson's boss in Old School.
• Naveen Andrews (Sayid) - A Middle Eastern guy playing Jafar on Once Upon in Wonderland, seems a little racist, but you do what you gotta do to make a paycheck.
• Daniel Dae Kim (Jin) - As soon as Lost was over, he immediately got a part on the Hawaii Five-O remake, so he's good to go for awhile.
• Yunjin Kim (Sun) - She's currently on some show called Mistresses with Alyssa Milano that I've never heard of.  Good for her.
• Emilie de Raven (Claire) - I'm a sucker for a chick with an accent, so I was glad to see that she is playing Belle (from Beauty and the Beast?) on Once Upon a Time, which is different from Once Upon a Time in Wonderland.  How?  No idea.
• Dominic Monaghan (Charlie) - Our favorite hobbit Merry is having no problems finding work, which includes hosting his own show, Wild Things with Dominic Monaghan.
• Harold Perrineau (Michael) - I was wrong when I said Hugo is having the most success after Lost left the air.  Walt's dad is killing it!  He's not in anything I've heard of, but he seems to be in everything.
• Micheal Emerson (Benjamin Linus) - Everyone's favorite villain is doing just fine with the show Person of Interest alongside Jesus.  Also, did you know he's married to hot redhead, Arlene, from True Blood?
• Henry Ian Cusick (Desmond) - I only included this guy because he was my favorite character on the show.  How's his career going?  Just fine even though I have never seen a single thing he has done.

You'll notice I left a couple of names off of the list like Boone, his sister Shannon, and Walt.  That's mostly because I found Shannon super annoying, Boone dies super early, and Walt kind of disappeared after the first season and wasn't seen again.

Today's Celebrity Birthdays - Dec 8th

I decided to start up a new post where I list the "celebrities" that were born on this day and then either praise them or mock them.  It will be fun, so let's do this:

• Kim Basinger (61) - Do you realize that the first Michael Keaton Batman came out 25 years ago?  And now you feel as old as Kim Basinger.  You're welcome.
• Dominic Monaghan (38) - Our favorite hobbit Merry from The Lord of the Rings/Charlie from Lost has a birthday today.  Good for him.
• Ian Somerhalder (36) - Another Lost alum.  He played Boone, you know, that guy who died really early on in the series and had that really annoying sister.  Also, it kind of pissed me off as I went to look him up and when I typed "Ian" into IMDB, his name came up first before Ian McKellen.  Somehow that seems wrong to me.
• AnnaSophia Robb (21) - Basically if you need a cute blond chick for something and can't afford Dakota Fanning, she is your go-to gal.  Trust me, you know who she is.
• Teri Hatcher (50) - I can't believe she is turning 50 today.  Where has the time gone?
• Nicki Minaj (32) - I only included her because I wanted to say that I don't know why she is famous.  Seriously, what does she do for a living?  I have no idea and it bugs me that I know who she is.
• Jim Morrison (Deceased) - Other than being the lead singer for The Doors, the only other thing I know about this guy is that he is buried in Paris for some reason.  Knowledge is Power!
• David Carradine (Deceased) - Bill from Kill Bill would have had a birthday today if it wasn't for, you know, that whole choking to death while getting off thing.  That was really awkward to type.

"I told you know who she is, and no, that isn't Dakota Fanning.  Also, don't worry, she may look 14, but she is old enough to drink legally as of today."