Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Dreams

Like everybody else, I randomly have dreams while I sleep.  However, unlike most people, I have never had a sex dream.  You know, a dream where you get your bone on with a celebrity or that hot chick from work or the cute girl who sits beside you in math class.  Don't get me wrong, I have had plenty of dreams that involved a random girl, but none of them ended in sex.  There have been dreams with a lot of sexual implications and (sadly) cuddling, but for whatever reason, the horizontal mambo has never occurred.  My guess behind this is that my brain just likes to screw with me at night and my brain just gives me weird dreams instead of sexy ones.  For example, I once had a dream that started out where a female friend and myself went to the opera (why the opera?  I have no idea) and as we went to leave, I learned that in my dream world people didn't drive cars, instead we rode dinosaurs as transportation.  Yeah, that might be weird, but also awesome.  Anyways, as we were riding our Stegosaurus-car named Chappy home, we pulled up to a red light and our jerk neighbors pulled up beside us on their shiny new Tyrannosaurus Rex-SUV.  And because I hated our neighbors for some reason, I started talking shit to those jerks and that is when I told Chappy to kick their new dino-car's ass, which he promptly did.  So, as you can see my dreams are really strange in an awesome way, but for some reason, I have never had a sex dream and I wonder if that is normal.  Personally, it doesn't bother me because my dreams might actually be cooler than a sex dream  Then again, if you could pay to have a sex dream about Olivia Wilde, I would give all my money to that business.

"Another strange fact about me - I sleep with my eyes open.  On numerous occasions people have had conversations with me while I was asleep and they didn't realize it until later that I was actually unconscious."

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