Movie: The Amazing Spider-Man
Basic Plot: It's the unnecessary remake of the Spider-Man franchise that didn't do as well as the original but might have been better cast. Seriously, you all know you would much rather punch Tobey Maguire in the face than hang out with him any day.
I'm Okay With: The fact that I'm doing this post only because this movie came on Starz recently. The fact that Peter Parker was seen doing Spider-Man-like things in front of numerous people and no one seems to connect the two. The fact that the bad guy from OsCorp personally goes down to the VA Hospital to conduct human testing with their new wonder drug and doesn't just send a lackey to do it. The fact that Flash suddenly becomes friends with Peter for no reason even after humiliating him on the basketball court. The fact that this movie shows how Peter made the web-slingers but doesn't exactly explain how he was able to obtain the actually webbing, it's not like he is flush with cash and that stuff must have been expensive. The fact that another British actor is playing an iconic American superhero. The fact that when The Lizard breaks into OsCorp and is hunting Emma Stone, the movie plays some really unnecessary piano music. The fact that they show news footage of Spider-Man crawling up a building and the reporter says 'he is badly injured, it doesn't look like he is going to make it' and yet not only does he make it, but somehow takes on The Lizard and wins. The fact that it was so easy to follow Spider-Man with a news helicopter.
I'm Not Okay With: The fact that the cops send way too many officers after Spider-Man at the end of the movie instead of focusing on the giant lizard who is gassing people with a 'biological agent'. Sure, Spider-Man way be a vigilante but at least he isn't releasing unknown chemicals into the air and oh yeah, isn't a GIANT FUCKING LIZARD!! Hell, right before they pseudo-catch Spider-Man, Denis Leary hears over the radio that The Lizard is gassing his officers with a 'biological agent' and he still goes after Spider-Man, you know, the guy who has not actually tried to harm anyone yet. If you were a cop and it was your job to protect the city, who would you think is more dangerous - a guy in a mask who calls himself Spider-Man and up to this point has only caught criminals and saved a bunch of people on a bridge? Or a giant fucking lizard man who was the reason those people on the bridge where in danger in the first place and is currently trying to release an unknown substance into the air that is most likely harmful to the population and the reason you are ordering a city-wide evacuation? You go with the giant fucking lizard man every time, but not these cops. In fact, after an initial confrontation with The Lizard, it appears that they just leave him be. I am not okay with that.
 |
| "Is it just me or if you shrunk this guy's head a little, he would kind of look like one of the Goombas from the god-awful Super Mario Brothers movie?" |
No comments:
Post a Comment