Maxim Hot 100

I guess I should point out that Maxim's 2013 Hot 100 came out awhile back, but I just got around to seeing the list and couldn't resist bashing it.  Their criteria baffles me and I'm convinced they don't base their rankings on actual looks and more on popularity which defeats the purpose if you ask me.  So, I decided to do an Overrated and Underrated List of my own based on their stupid list.  Included with each "hottie" is their respective ranking.  Let's do this:

Top 5 Underrated

• 91) Allison Williams - You may or may not know who this is based on whether you have a girlfriend or wife who forces you to watch the HBO show Girls.  And if you do watch that show, then she is the only hot one on the show and deserves a better fate than being ranked 91st.  Also, she is NBC newsman Brian Williams' daughter.
• 58) Emmy Rossum - She may not be the hottest woman in the world, but if you have seen Shameless then you would agree that she is an incredible actress.  Plus it doesn't hurt that she constantly goes topless on that show and has great boobs.
• 56) Amber Heard - Amber probably hasn't been in anything you have seen (unless you like terrible movies), but she is gorgeous and her ranking of 56th is a sham.
• 84) Alice Eve - The new addition to the Star Trek franchise is a 10 in my book and the fact that she is ranked behind Ke$ha is fucking hysterical.  That only proves Maxim's list is stupid.
• 65) Emilia Clarke - Hottie McDragonQueen from Game of Thrones is insane hot, how is she only 65th on Maxim's list?  And considering I think this list is based on popularity, her ranking baffles me even further because of how popular she is right now.

Top 10 Overrated

• 11) Katy Perry - Well, at least she isn't ranked 1st like she was in 2010.  I think I heard it best from ESPN's Matthew Berry.  He said, "If you left Katy Perry off of this list, would anyone notice?".
• 19) Emma Watson - I actually think Emma is quite attractive, but not attractive enough to quantify a Top 20 ranking.  Her spot on this list is definitely based on popularity alone.
• 3) Rihanna - Ranking her third is absurd.  She should be dropped off this list completely because she went out with Chris Brown again after he hit her.  No one that stupid should ever be ranked third, let alone 103rd.
• 9) Vanessa Hudgens - Ninth?  No.  Forty Ninth?  Maybe, but that's still pushing it.
• 14) Beyonce - I still don't see everyone's fascination with Beyonce.  She's easy on the eyes and has some singing talent, but she single-handedly ruined the third Austin Powers movie with her awful acting and that can't be forgiven.
• 62) Cameron Diaz - Is it just me or is Cameron about one more plastic surgery away from looking like that scary cat-looking lady that has gone under the knife way too many times?
• 2) Selena Gomez - Just click that link.  She looks like she is 12 years old.  I'm sorry but you can never put a girl that young-looking as your 2nd hottest person on your list.  The feds should be talking to Maxim about this.
• 1) Miley Cyrus - What?!?  First?!?  Are you kidding me?!?  That haircut alone should have knocked her off the entire list by itself.
• 78) Ke$ha - This one baffles me.  When was the last time anyone said to themselves, "I think Ke$ha is hot"?  Never.  Therefore, she should not be on this list.
• 39) Leah Michele - Yuk.  I could see this manly-looking woman ranking 39th on a Hot 100 list for dudes, but 39th for woman is just wrong.  So very very wrong.

"I guess I should point out that Hoda Kotb was picked number 79 which was higher than new Star Trek hottie Alice Eve, but lower than Manti Te'o's Fake Girlfriend.  Who the fuck is making this list?!?!"