Florida
"Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron."
and
"Women may not expose their breasts while performing 'topless dancing'."
and
"Women may not expose their breasts while performing 'topless dancing'."
A double dose of stupid on this one. Both dumb laws seem to make it illegal to even have strip clubs worth going to in Florida, and yet, Miami is known to have some really nice establishments (fellow Brainfart contributor, Alex, told me how awesome they are). Now, if you are going to allow lap dances, but not allow the girl with daddy issues to grind away on your crouch, then why call them lap dances at all. Wouldn't they just be called "private dances"? That law is so dumb the wording doesn't even make sense. And speaking of dumb wording, strippers can't show their boobs during topless dancing?!? The lawmakers who came up with this one do realize how stupid that sounds, right? I guess not because they still went ahead and made this ridiculous law anyways. And for that matter, if strippers can't dance topless, and they can't give proper lap dances, why didn't they just outlaw strip clubs altogether? Wouldn't that make way more sense? Of course it would! Damn it Florida, you have truly topped yourselves this time.
 |
| "Damn it rookie, this is an undercover lap dance sting, don't look so happy." "I'm just staying in character, Sarge." "Oh. Good thinking. Keep it up." "Not a problem, hehe." "Get your head out of the gutter, rookie, you're a professional." |
No comments:
Post a Comment