NOKW - Robin Hood

Here comes the next chapter in our "I'm Okay With, I'm Not Okay With" series (if you don't know what this is, click here for all of the past posts):

Movie:  Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

Basic Plot:  Robin Hood comes home to find his home burned to the ground and his father murdered at the hands of the evil Sheriff of Nottingham.  So he bands a group of vagrants together to help him overthrow Hans Gruber.

I'm Okay With:  The fact that Kevin Costner abandons his pathetic attempt at a British accent fairly early on in the movie.  The fact that it seems okay for Professor Snape to murder a nobleman, oppress the shit out of his people, and ruthlessly run his land into the ground with zero repercussions from someone higher up than him on the Feudal System Chain.  The fact that a group of ruffians were able to hide in a forest so easily and were not found until someone betrayed them.  The fact that those same ruffians let some nobleman led their group especially when his only friend at that point was scary looking black wizard.  The fact that before the final battle, Little John was able to scale the wall of Nottingham Castle without being seen when two seconds later, they show guards patrolling the grounds.  The fact that when Robin and Morgan Freeman are catapulted into the Sheriff's castle, they just so happen to land on the only pile of hay in the whole place.  The fact that when King Richard (aka Sean Connery) rolls up at the end, he doesn't put Robin in jail for causing an uprising and killing a bunch of people even if it was to save Maid Marion.

I'm Not Okay With:  The fact that the Sheriff was so obsessed with with getting married to Maid Marion instead of attempting to flee from an uprising.  That's right, Metatron (that's his character in Dogma) thought it would be a better idea to get married and bone right there in the chapel instead of escaping from an attack that was obviously not going in his favor.  Sure, men will do most anything to get some, but I'm pretty sure that his own life should have come first, then bumping uglies second.  But no, he let that crazy witch lady talk him into banging Marion and in all honesty, I'm still not entirely why sure she wanted this to happen in the first place.  Was it some sort of prophecy?  Did the witch just like seeing people do it?  Who the hell knows, but I do know that Doctor Lazarus (that would be his character in the underrated Galaxy Quest) should have gotten out of the middle of that uprising before he got his ass stabbed like he did.  I am not okay with that.

"Then again, this guy doesn't look  sane, so his actions shouldn't be held against him."